Chapter 1 – Pain, Love, Hatred, and Thoughts

Hearts with candy bars (Pain)

I miss the time with you, but I shall not give you another chance, ‚cause you drew those hearts on my scars – only to rip them open like candy bars. And now I’m here, in this dark room, begging myself to just look at the moon instead of changing the universe too soon.

Meanwhile, I will secretly hope you still think of me a little bit – looking at our dusty photos and wondering why it needed to end like that.

Music (Love)

The bass getting thrown against my throat felt like I was getting choked. And as weird as it may sound, that was when I felt the most free and human alike.

Once it collided with my neck, I could feel it run through my whole body. And from now on, I wasn’t alive because of my heart, ‚cause of the blood flowing underneath my skin.

I was breathing; I was living because of the music crawling deeply inside of me.

Lovers Mind (Thoughts)

Writing — it’s biting into my fingers. The words are screaming in my mind, in my palace of broken dreams.

They’re walking hand in hand, looking at each other as lovers would do.

And their screams, while looking into each other’s eyes, are no issue. They do it until I do it. Until I take my pen and write, write the lovers out of my mind.