Diary of a cat. Part 2.

13 December

Susi had organised a thorough cleaning of the flat. She calls it cleaning week. Terrible! After she had cleaned, I couldn’t find my diary for three days. Out of sheer frustration, I chewed on her slipper. It doesn’t taste so good, but it melts in your mouth … She didn’t understand. Shouted “I’m going to get a throat!” (“I’m about to get a throat!” or “I’m about to get angry!” in Swabian dialect) and slapped her hands over her head. I will not tolerate this disrespect under any circumstances! That’s why I peed in the second slipper.

Now I’m sitting in the storeroom. It’s nice here … With old books, dust and boxes. My mind wanders and I wonder if there are any hidden treasures up here. I wonder what she has hidden on the top shelf. I’ve always wanted to see it, and now is the chance. First level, second level … Have I put on weight? Can’t be, I’ve seen myself in the mirror as handsome as I am. Third level … Who had the stupid idea to build such high shelves? Did he have cats in mind? I don’t think so. To be honest, not a cat lover, I think. Finally, the fourth level … I’m completely out of breath … From 1 January, I promise I’ll move more.

What does it say? “Weihnachtsku….” further on is illegible. “Ku …” Cake? Ha! She’s hidden cake here? I always thought the tastiest things were at the top. Quick, open the box. “Boom! Clang!” – Well, it was probably “Christmas baubles”.

Sitting locked in the cupboard now. Dark here. Dark and boring. What a day … I’m singing with boredom. My voice is so beautiful! Really admirable, I think! Susi shouts something … She probably wants another encore. Well then: “Mijau-u-u!” She already seems to miss my company. Maybe I should sing her another tune to pass the time. After all, my musical skills are not to be underestimated. “Mijau-u-u!” it sounds again from the darkness.