[i’m fucking beyond hope]

it almost worked,

i felt at peace with the things that happened,

with what is lost forever,

with what won’t ever be whole again; who could have guessed, it didn’t last;

at night, i asked the moon, “tell me, will i ever be whole again? “
“no, but you will have to keep trying to love yourself through all of your phases just like i do, darling,” the moon answered while covering me in their soft light

[i’m fucking beyond hope]

“can you keep a secret for me?”, i asked the moon;

i am afraid. i am afraid of memories from the past, of the uncertainty that the future holds;

i really lost all control this time, the voices are getting louder and louder,

i can’t keep the nightmares out, they’re haunting me, day and night

i can’t do it alone this time, take me home

but, tell me, where is my home?

“i can’t replace your home, but i will always be with you, no matter where you’re going”, the moon whispered softly.

[i’m fucking beyond hope]
[i’m fucking beyond hope]

can i still be who i always wanted to be? did i ever know who i really wanted to be?
will he keep me in chains ’till i die? did i ever try to free myself at all?
will he ever change? why do i fall for his stupid lies over and over again?

[i’m fucking beyond hope]
[i’m fucking beyond hope]
[i’m fucking beyond hope]