What would be your favourite compliment?

The question lingered in the air between us. It felt odd. On one hand, it is that you asked, but I barely know you beyond your name and hobbies. I don’t even know if I like you, I’ve never thought much about you. On the other hand, the question itself made me pause. It was like I couldn’t find an answer to it. What would make my heart feel warm? Compliments are usually intended to make you smile or at least grin on the inside. But what would really touch me, make my heart shudder because of the meaning behind the words?

Often, compliments are made about the outside, like “You’re so beautiful” or “I love your smile.” Nice, sure, but they can be a little… uncreative. I mean, yes, I like being told I have pretty eyes or nice hair, but it feels a little too expected, a little too surface-level. If someone complimented my appearance, I’d rather they told me something poetic or used a metaphor, something unique. “Your hair is like a waterfall of sunlight” or “Your eyes are like the storm-roaring ocean.” It’s more about the way they make me feel, not just that I look “pretty.” Do I want to be pretty? I’m not really sure…

I believe there’s something special about when someone notices the things you don’t necessarily like about yourself. Maybe it’s the hands that feel too big for a girl or the thighs you think are too thick or your belly that you feel self-conscious about. What really warms my heart is when someone sees something in me that I don’t even see in myself, something I might not even like about me. When someone admires the very parts of you that you’re unsure about, it can feel like a deep kind of validation.

When it comes to the inner side, that’s where I truly want to be seen. It shows someone isn’t just looking at the outer shell but at what makes me… me. Maybe they admire the energy I bring, the way I live loudly, unapologetically vibrant, like a disco ball in the grey mass of people. Or maybe they appreciate how quiet and reflective I am, how much I contemplate life, how deeply I question the world. Those things matter to me more than being told I’m pretty. To be noticed for the things that make me me, the things that are sometimes seen as flaws or weaknesses, now that feels real.

In the end, the most beautiful compliment isn’t one that’s spoken, but one that’s felt. It’s the kind of compliment that says, “I see all of you: the parts you’re still figuring out, the parts you’ve learned to love and the parts you’re still struggling with, you’re still learning to accept.” It’s about being with someone who understands you, not just in the big moments, but in the small, quiet parts of you. The compliment that matters most is the one that lets you be you – unfiltered, unguarded, and loved for exactly who you are.