10. Alexandra

“Explain to me again, why are we wandering around on our own, without notifying my father or the army?” Myra asks while she sits in front of the tiny mirror and combs her hair. I had stolen a few coins here and there, but barely enough to afford the minuscule room. Making our way to Alethon on foot is hard but at least I can sleep at night since we don’t travel by carriage anymore. Myra insists I lie with her on the bed instead of the cold floor. Those beds we share are too comfortable to not fall asleep.
“Because the last time I let somebody know, I almost got you killed.” Myra watches me through the mirror, still brushing her hair.
“That is not your fault. Who would have thought that the general – and who knows how many more knights – would want to see me dead?”
“I should’ve noticed when he refused to take any precautions to keep you safe. I should have insisted on sending another guard with us. Only allowing you one is irresponsible.” Myra spins around on her stool. Since the room is so small, her face ends up mere inches away from mine. She has no problem reaching my cheeks and cupping them, cutting me off mid-sentence. I’m taken aback by the slight roughness of her hands, before I remember her love for gardening. And still they don’t compare with mine, covered in scars, and oftentimes dirty.
“Stop it. It is not your fault. Apart from that, it has already happened. You can not change it now, only make it better.” Her eyes never leave mine, her thumbs slowly caressing my cheeks. “And you saved me twice. I think that cancels out.”
I’m not convinced, but I know how stubborn Myra is, so I don’t contradict her. We look into each other’s eyes, even if I know I should look away. “Princess-“
“We talked about this. Call me Myra, like you always have.” She lets go of me and faces the mirror again. “Care to braid my hair?”
, I stand up and place myself right behind her.
I’ve always loved her hair, and I still do. It’s not the first time I’m braiding it, I used to do it almost every night, so I know the way she likes it.
Pulling one strand of her over another, I tie them close to her scalp when she suddenly asks: “Why did you leave that night? Why did you leave. . .” She takes a deep breath. “me.”
I don’t stop my hands , glad to give them something to do and not have to look at her. The knight, the guard I am, should lie, and brush it off, but for the last few days, I didn’t feel like that person anymore. I simply felt like Alexandra. She doesn’t feel like the Princess, but like Myra, my childhood friend that I always wanted to be more.
So I tell the truth and speak quietly. “I never wanted to leave.” I won’t lie, but that doesn’t mean I tell her the whole story either . I still refuse to look at her and she doesn’t ask any more questions. she understands, I know she does. She always did, even when I never shared much of myself. It feels like it’s time to let her in some more. Not right at this moment, but soon.
When I finish her braid, I watch Myra examine it. Her face lights up with a bright smile, dimples, shining eyes and, at that moment, I realise my heart doesn’t belong to me anymore.
“Now let me braid your hair too.”