11 The Truth Untold

We’d already seen each other for a few times and we’d worn the ring every time. We’d not only had “professional meetings” in the studio but had also grown very close to each other. We’d laughed and had gotten frustrated. We’d been proud of ourselves and hopeless. You’d gotten to know me pretty well and I’d gotten to know you even better.
You were the same as on my screen, but far more fascinating, wonderful, indescribable. There was a charm of yours I could only experience while being directly next to you. You were an angel in my eyes, but you also seemed so real, so human, so beautiful. How you thought, wrote songs and had the prettiest ideas inspired me to become a better human. You always listened to me – whenever we talked about our lives and I opened up to you about my past, my pain and struggles, my dreams, my fears. However, I’d never told you about “us”. Only about your music being my salvation. But I still wanted to tell you the entire truth. I didn’t know if you’d ever noticed how I’d been looking at you. And I didn’t know if you had any feelings for me. Although you always looked at me in a kind of way that made me feel dizzy, and you were so extremely kind, understandable and respectful and sometimes flirty, I guessed you were just being yourself. But silently I hoped your actions had been meaningful to you too.

It was the last day we’d work on “Maybe”. You’d said we should meet at your house because of your personal studio with better equipment and instruments. And I really had no idea if you’d want to see me again. I didn’t want us to be separated again, I’d rather choose to die.
I was in front of your apartment door for the first time. You’d given me your address, which was unbelievable. I knocked at your door while my hands, legs and every cell of mine were shaking. When I saw you in front of me, I felt my nervousness becoming stronger but every little worry going away. You were wearing a white T-Shirt and black pants, but my heart still couldn’t take your handsomeness. You smiled at my reaction, which embarrassed me.
“Hi”, I said shyly.
“Hi! Come inside, I’ve already prepared everything. Can’t wait ‘til the world gets to hear this song.”
I giggled because you were the cutest. “Me too. I really feel so positive about this one because it has such a special feeling that comes with it.”
“Agree.” Every word you spoke made my heartbeat go insane.
While I was entering, I tried to admire everything in your home. And I recognized so many things I’d already seen before on the screen. Sadly, I didn’t have much time to keep staring because I needed to follow you into your studio, which was a piece of art by itself.

The moment we didn’t come up with any more ideas, you told me to go to the living room because you’d prepare some tea for us.
I was sitting on the couch and admired your back for a few seconds, but tried to look away because I was too afraid you might notice.
When you came back to me, I smiled. “Thank you. Which tea did you make?”
“Jasmine tea. Your favorite one.” You were smiling your shy smile again.
I was so surprised that I had to put myself together. “You remembered I like this one?”
“How couldn’t I? It’s easy to remember.”
And that was the moment I decided to tell you everything.