Bad timing, good guy

The whole bad timing is a never-ending circle. If they didn’t break your heart, you probably broke someone else. I had gone through heartbreaks that sounded like, “Oh, I chose her, sorry.” The ones that leave you feeling not good enough and that there must be something wrong with you. It feels awful to be the second best. The one who is fine but not as fine as their first choice. You know, the one that feels like a one-way loving path: yours only. Unrequited love.

I was always the one who got hurt until I sadly hurt someone else with no intention whatsoever. Here goes my story:

I had met someone whom I liked a lot. A short romance, but it felt intense. I really felt connected to this person. The sexual chemistry was on point, and he was a very masculine guy. I consider myself an “alpha” female, but I felt like a princess with this guy. His alpha energy made me feel protected, and I acted so submissively! But no, he wasn’t that nice, and to cut the story short, I was trying to get over him.

In that process, I decided to use my favorite get-over-it dating app to meet someone. And yes, I was open to serious dating but also to getting distracted. I was supposed to meet a friend, but she ditched me. Since I was free, I texted the guy I had matched with, and we met near a church. He was tall, pretty average, and nice. Our energies were so in sync. He was such a happy person, and we got along super well. When we were walking back to say goodbyes, he kissed me. He had nice full lips. I like that. We saw each other again for another date, and things were going well. He was a nice guy, an engineer, a scout.

Things kept flowing. Morning and night dates. I felt so comfortable with him. I could be myself. He had to go on a trip for work, and before he left, he asked me to be his girlfriend, and I said yes. He was also planning a trip with his friends the following year, and I was invited. He was already making plans so that we could go on vacations, but I had just started a new job, so things were complicated. I was happy but still couldn’t believe how fast it all happened.

While all this was happening, the other guy I mentioned first decided to contact me again. Not only that, but he ended up confessing he had cheated on me before. He had lied to me, as I had suspected in the first place. That destroyed me. I started crying. I felt confused. I thought I had gotten over him. Sadly, I knew that only meant one thing: I needed to tell the new guy how I felt and why. I needed to heal first. I told him I couldn’t be his girlfriend. I told him about the other guy. He accepted it. He never told me he was sad, but he didn’t speak to me for half a year or so. I think he was also dealing with his own emotions and personal things.

Bad timing, good guy. He was indeed nice. I was sad that he got hurt, but I had to be true to myself. I just hope he finds the right person for him. I also hope he remembers the good, short memories we had. I know I do.