Beautiful cryer

I always thought I was a beautiful cryer

When my eyes were red from all my tears

And I suddenly wasn’t hiding them anymore

All my sorrows and all my fears

But then you happened

And everything changed

My so-called perfect life

With my beautiful crying

Suddenly, got disarranged

The thoughtful sobbing stopped

Was replaced by endless screaming

Or sometimes just longing for air

In solitary moments

When I hope nobody’s seeing

What I’ve become

What is left when you went

What I borrowed from you

And what I simply lent

What I am without you

The rock bottom of my soul

My life, my heart, my mind

Which never again will be whole

Eventually, someone will try to fill the gap

But they’ll never succeed

When I will only find my peace

Cradled in your lap

On the day I too will leave