Bus Farts

I get on the bus
It’s full
Edging my way closer to the back
People reluctantly moving their bags
Hoping it’s not them I choose
They’d rather have the extra space to snooze

“I’m sorry can I sit here?”
You lose

I sit and press my bag down by my legs,
Try to get comfy,
Say sorry,
And settle in for the journey ahead

We set off,
Suddenly a vulgar shock to my senses
Creeping into my nose
The unwelcome smell of egg

We’ve only been on the road for 15 minutes or so and I can already tell this is my fate
Sitting here
Tired and cramped
Having to smell the last thing you ate.

Once, okay, I’ll deal with that,
But the retched smell your gut is trying to dispel keeps coming back

I understand, we can’t always hold it in,
Jeez ive been guilty of this sin
And im not usually one to kick up a fuss
But this bus stinks of guffs
And ive had enough.

2 hours in and you’re still going
By this point its become the norm
Mixed with a hint of feet
On this bus its impossible to be discreet

Its so powerful I start to wonder
Is it you?
The girl I chose to sit next to?
You’re asleep
Clutching your bag
Maybe the choice I made was bad

But I suppose it doesn’t matter where we sit
Whoever you are
We are all in it together
Breathing through our mouths
A silent endeavor
I shut my eyes and take the hit
On the National Express of rotten shit