by eatmorearts
Again and again. The loop is always working. The circular process with no starting point and end. The infinite looping of my thoughts. There are from time to time small plot twists, which bring the loop tho get slower and maybe change one or the other curve. But nothing stable. Nothing powerful enough to break the loop in my mind.
The music is playing. Me, my pen in the hand and some pillows around me. A typical representation of this year. The pen is the only tool which can bit the loop. Unload my thoughts. Unload the fear in my heart. On the other hand, this loop is mine. This is the constant I need. It is a present and sustainable variable of my development through time. It helps me to stay sane. It saves me from depressive dreams and inspires me to share with the world wide web my insecurities.
Again and again. I am lonely. I am an artistic soul trying to find the way out from this loop. Why am I still coming back to it? Is this habit feeding my self-destructiveness? But I like my zone. I like staying in it. Why are you dragging me out of it? Why do you want to love me? Why would think that I can’t stay in it and be by your side? Let’s create our love loop. Do not make me go barefoot over broken glass.
Again and again. The sun comes out, night comes. You are online. You call. I am tired. I am insecure. One more round in my subconscious and I will be by you.
I pick up.
How am I ? I am fine. I am cold.
Why am I cold? I need touch. I need a hug. I need a dance.
But how can you promise that?
© eatmorearts 2020-11-27