Letter for the girl in black part II

I want to believe that you had a great time. I saw you laughing, the sound of your voice made me curious and incredibly jealous. I wanted to know what it was the cause for that burst of joy; I wanted to be near you and hear your witty remarks.

He’s a lucky man. Did you laugh at something that he said ? Does he make you happy?

I saw you in the hallway, entering the house, and I pretended to be absorbed into an important discussion, but I’ve been waiting for you for hours at that point. The other girls turned their heads to scrutinize you, all of them were wearing reveling and extravagant, colorful and glittery clothes, but it was you and your simple black dress that caught my attention. You felt their glacial, subtitle glances like arrows on your skin, and kept your head down. You probably thought that you weren’t elegant enough, but give me the permission to banish that thought. They were jealous, all of them. You were shining brightly, filling the room with your presence without realizing the impact that you’ve caused around you. I fought with the urge to run towards you, to cup your chin and guide your stare towards me, for you to find the answer in my eyes, my undiminished admiration and my tremendous amount of love. You noticed Crystal and your steps began to hurry, I watched you crossing the room meeting with our old common friends. I didn’t know that you were still in good terms with them, and for a second I was a young boy again. A wave of emotions rushed through my mind and I felt dizzy. Your boyfriend was sitting next to you, it was a small space between your bodies, and you have no idea how much joy caused me the simple fact that he wasn’t holding your hand. Only to be shut by a deadly arrow the second he placed his arm around your back. I didn’t want to interrupt the discussion. They welcomed me with friendliness and warmth, but somehow I felt like that life passed over me and things changed so much, and it was in vain to act like I never left. Oh, God! I’ve missed that life. It was much easier back then. And in a moment of exacerbation I painted a happy expression on my ever glumly face and strolled towards you. Nick extended his arm and put his hand on my shoulder, offering me a drink. I declined. I wanted to be awake, to not waste that precious time. I didn’t know when I would have the chance to be in the same room with you again. You didn’t see me at first. You were keeping your eyes on the walls, staring at your hands or playing with your bracelet and once in a while speaking with Crystal. I was closer to you, the greetings coming from the small group pushed you to turn your face towards me and our eyes meet. I remained like a statue, the world around us drowning in noises and clashing sounds, while we were staying in deep silence.