okay

I say „ok“, but I’m not okay. I accept your decision, yet it still hurts. Maybe it’s because of the way you say it, cold, almost indifferent, evaluating. The situation reminds me of another day in this location, our first days. You made me uncomfortable with your straightforwardness, pulled me out of my comfort zone.

For my own good?

You tried to show me another world, but eventually I didn’t have a place in it. I learnt, I laughed, I cried, I reached my limits. Now I lost my looking glass into that world and this feeling is tearing me apart.

No, I’m not okay, not right now, but I will be again.

I’m not one of your social projects. Experiment, observe, evaluate. No, I’m an individual. And I will succeed your expectations, I will surprise you, but you will also find me lacking. I’m not perfect, no one is. There is no such thing.

Is acceptance too much to ask for? I will evolve in my own pace, but that evolution will not happen to your desire. You better work on yourself, instead. Learn the magic of compromises, live your own individuality and let others live theirs.

The moment you stop evolving, is the moment you die. Forcing yourself to stop in your stance, blinding yourself against the new, limiting yourself, would all be a waste.

After time passes, you look back at acquaintances with a smile. Even if they hurt you, you can smile because it’s a memory and you learnt your lesson.

Friends parted ways and lovers
ended up with others.

Memories are experiences, lessons of life. You get to know yourself better, learn how to accept reality with all its flaws and how to set priorities. Time can heal scars until they fade away and only a smile on your face is left.